Jury duty

Hi Folks!

I was scheduled to appear for jury duty the other day. I'd gotten one of them notices in the mail awhile back telling me I'd been selected and when to show up. Sorta felt like winnin the lottery. Out of all those millions of folks livin in the county they selected me. Felt real proud. Happy to do my civic duty. I was really lookin forward to it... would've had to get all dressed up... no blue jeans for that... had my clothes all picked out... something real professional lookin. Then they went and canceled the whole thing. When I checked in with their automated system the night before, it up and told me that I wasn't needed no more. Didn't seem right... I was all prepared... but nooooo... it was done... kaput... finished before I even had a chance to say just how non-judgmental I am. Well knowing how the wheels of justice roll around here, I figured something must have been up so I checked with Earl... he's in security at the courthouse... to see ifn I could maybe find out what was behind this sudden change in plans.

Well Earl weren't no help at all. Seems he'd been off the past couple days helpin his sister and her family shear their herd of Snerts. Tough job that what with the thickness of the wool and the fact that them Snerts are as smart as a Two Tailed Cryer. I mean they may be good natured and docile but theyse knows when shearing time is coming and they do their best to make themselves scare. Now they seem to actually enjoy the shearing process itself... gettin rid of all that wool and all... but it's just like any kid... tryin to get them to the barbershop is the toughest part of the deal. Once they're there they accept it well enough but gettin them there in the first place...

Well them Snerts is exactly the same way. Theyse too smart for themselves sometimes. Why they even get wind of shearing time and the scatter to the farthest reaches of the pasture. Takes the whole family to chase them down and herd them back to the pen where the shearing's done. So that's what Earl was doing the other day when whatever happened to cause my jury duty cancellation... chasing Snerts and holding them while his sister worked them shears like a pro. Best shearer this side of Livingstone... learned it at her daddy's knee... don't know why Earl never got any good at it... I guess some folks just have the knack. Others... well maybe that's why Earl's a security guard at the courthouse.

Anyways, Earl told me that Henry Pickins was working that day and saw what happened. Gave Earl the lowdown on what went down. Yeah... Seems there was a real interesting case on Nauga farm design registration. You know, that's what folks use to mark their Naugas so they can tell which one's belong to who. Well anyways, it seems that Bull Maccalley decided to start up raisin Naugas. He'd been doin crop farmin and raising some pigs and cattle but felt he needed to diversify with somethin that was a little easier to keep up with. Guess he'll learn that Naugas can be a real handful ifn you don't knows what you're doin.

Well like anyone who's got any amount of Naugas... or intends to... Bull decided he'd mark them Naugas with something to distinguish them from other folk's. He came up with something that resembles a cross between a Long Necked Saratine and a Hollowback. Why he'd want to mix them two critters is anybody's guess what with them legs and wings and well... the result just wasn't real pretty. Problem is... Arnolf Jonson had come up with something pretty similar ten years earlier. Took Bull to court over the similarities. Well the judge decided he'd need to see something more concrete than just some pictures on a piece of paper before he'd be able to really judge ifn those designs were too close to allow Bull to use his. Told them both to bring one of their Naugas in so he could examine the markings up close as they would be used.

So both Arnolf and Bull brought in a Nauga for the judge to take a look at. Only problem was, since the judge didn't specify, Bull brought a male in while Arnolf brought in a female. Well you guessed it. As soon as those two Naugas caught wind of each other in the courtroom they got reeeal friendly like. Couldn't have kept them apart with a forklift. The on-duty security folks didn't know that of course never having dealt with Naugas up close. Oh they'd seen them at the Fair but seeing them at a distance and dealing with them on a day to day basis is a completely different business. Well those two guards figured they'd try and separate them two Naugas so the judge could take a look at them. That's when things got real interesting as I understand it. Them Naugas didn't take kindly to the guards' efforts and theyse started thrashing and fighting and running around. Yes sirree bob, theyse completely tore up that courtroom. Broke all the desks and the railing and all the juror seating and everything. It'll take them about three weeks to get it all repaired and set back to rights from what Earl's been told. Never did decide if Bull's design was too close to Arnolf's. Gonna have to take that matter back up once the courtrooms fixed.

Anyways, that's why they went and canceled my jury duty. Now I have to wait another whole year before I find out ifn I gets picked again.

Guess that's it for now. 'Til next time. Jon